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Home  /  World  /  Who is Amalia Demonte? The woman to whom Pope Francis sent a love letter before priesthood: ‘If I do not marry you…’

Who is Amalia Demonte? The woman to whom Pope Francis sent a love letter before priesthood: ‘If I do not marry you…’

by Siddhi Vinayak Misra
April 23, 2025
in Europe, World
Reading Time: 3 mins read
A teenage heartbreak that changed the course of Catholic history

Pope Francis, who passed away on Monday at the age of 88 following a brain stroke, led a life shaped not just by faith, but also by a poignant moment of youthful heartbreak. Before dedicating himself to the Church, the man born Jorge Mario Bergoglio in Buenos Aires once fell deeply in love with a neighbor named Amalia Demonte.

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A youthful romance in Buenos Aires

Long before he became the first Latin American Pope, young Jorge lived with his family on Membrillar Street in Buenos Aires, Argentina. Just four doors away lived Amalia Demonte, the girl who would become the subject of his early affection.

The future pope, driven by the ordinary dreams of love and family, once wrote a heartfelt letter to Amalia.

According to her, he even built a tiny wooden model of a house with a red roof, inscribed with a promise: “This is what I will buy when we get married.”

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The love letter carried a line that has since become part of papal lore: “If I do not marry you, I will become a priest.”

Related Article:

Why Jorge Mario Bergoglio chose ‘Francis’ as his pope name

A letter that ended a chapter

Years later, in an interview with the Associated Press, Amalia reflected on the moment that shifted the course of both their lives. She described how Jorge’s romantic note stirred trouble in her household. Her strict parents, enraged by the idea of their daughter exchanging love letters, destroyed the small house he had crafted.

Amalia said her mother sternly confronted her, questioning why she was receiving letters from a boy. The young romance ended there, but the emotional imprint remained.

Related Article:

The real reason Pope Francis’ simple coffin is not placed on a raised bier or catafalque

From heartbreak to holy orders

Born into a family of Italian immigrants, Jorge spent his adolescence in Buenos Aires, where he completed a chemistry degree and took on jobs ranging from janitor to nightclub bouncer. Amidst this, he underwent a profound spiritual transformation, one that led him to choose a path in the priesthood—a path that would eventually lead him to the papacy.

Over the years, Pope Francis acknowledged his youthful emotions and longings in interviews and books like “On Heaven and Earth” and “The Name of God Is Mercy.” He openly spoke of once wanting to start a family and experiencing the feelings of love like any other young man.

But his decision to become a priest after heartbreak became a turning point—not just for him, but for the Catholic Church, which he went on to transform through a decade of reform and humility.

With Pope Francis’ death, memories of his human, humble beginnings have resurfaced—including his quiet romance with Amalia Demonte, the girl next door who unknowingly played a role in shaping the future of the Church.

Tags: Amalia DemontePope Francis
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